That is a quote from Twelfth Night, it goes like this, " O time! Thou hast to untangle this, not I; it is too hard for me to untie!"

I so agree to this quote, what ever the situation I'm stuck in, only time can untangle it, why with God's help off course. Here's the thing, I have issues with myself, I tend to take heed of what the devil says I'm not good at. I most certainly know that I'm not a quick leaner and most certainly not smart in terms of intellectual thinking. And worse thing of all is that I don't have that confidence to help me stand up in this muddy platform. So what ever bad that comes to me, I just can't help but be defeated.

I know it's a mad mad world out there, but it just hurts my heart when you shove reality in my face. It hurts when you just tell me off the things that you think is right. It hurts when you just make me swallow what I spat out in words, making me think what I said is useless and rubbish... It hurts even more when you don't even want to explain to me what you really mean coz deep down in my heart, I really wanna know you. I really want to have conversations with you that is about what you think, what has been bothering you and what you really want in life, your values... so who cares what I think, who cares what I feel, just lash out...... Coz all I want from you is you.

Sometimes I myself don't understand why I'm like this, I don't understand why I feel like this and why I think this way. And it is for that reason that I start to think that I'm probably insane.... I hope I'm not.

Life is so complicated on it's own and so disturbing when the human mind and body works.... I wish I could be literally creative and like have a big bank of words that could express my inner thoughts.......

I'm weird, I know I am and I know I am not that smart, but I can't deny I'm not human. Thus I'm not one of the people who are exempted to make mistakes and fall into pots and pits and quicksand....I find people's words sometimes rather painful and poisonous to hear and it is very disturbing to the brain and does no form of healing the hurt.....

I just want to go back to my maker sometimes and just wish that it wouldn't be complicated like how it is right now......
"
I don't like the fact that I'm always starting each paragraph with 'I'..... it's too selfish sounding......

I'm tired and sleepy and need to go sleep now so goodbye.